Ignorance is bliss…

Today is one of those days when I really wish I was not so aware of everything to do with pregnancy. But I do..i know everything that can go wrong…Last time I got a BFP, I didn’t even reach this far…so I am completely in a new phase, but somehow I feel I know it all…All those hours of reading! I have an overload of information…

I got my BFP on the 4th evening, and I had put down my papers at work that very day! I had decided 15 days ago that I couldn't continue working at this office. It was stressing me out and just didn’t feel worth it. After my BFP I decided that I will not even serve my two month notice period. The first trimester is the most important. I just don’t want to take any risks. From April I may get a job (fingers crossed) that I can do from home. But this decision meant I lost 2 months salary…

I make more money than Mallik and I know this loss of salary will pinch us. I also send money home to my mother…I am so tired of being responsible. I wanted to able to be a little selfish and think of my little bean…I trying hard to shrug off this feeling of guilt and thing only about the life inside…The doctor had asked me specifically not to travel by autos (a mode of transport in India, which I use to go to work everyday) and I cannot afford taxi everyday.

So here I am..at home…trying to stay positive…Just give me two months…let me give my best to the dream we have had…Let me put my feet up and think of nothing but good things…let me not worry about money…give me strength….

PS: Thanks so much girls for your best wishes…I don’t know what we did different last month…I truly think it may have something to do with the energy card Dan sent me…Thanks Dan…and yes the baby is going to called Dan!!!